The Only Opposition That Exists Is Distraction

A physicist will tell you that if you go deep enough into matter that the energy that composes it is connected to all the energy that composes everything in the universe. They say that energy becomes like a field of instant communication where all matter "talks" to all matter. This is because everything is in unity. That's just common sense when you think about it. The moon doesn't fight with the sun. The ocean doesn't fight with the land. Everything is in one giant "field" of connectivity. It's unified. It couldn't be any other way and function.

Now, when I had my out-of-body experience, this was more than a concept. I experienced the reality of it. I could feel that there was one energy that composed everything. There was a sensation to it. It was rather awesome because I knew with real certainty that there was no such thing as opposition. Being in that knowing, though it was for a short while, was a relief because I felt absolutely safe and secure. It was like I got to hit "pause" on the game we're playing here and see the bigger picture for a moment. The big picture is unity. Another way to say this is that there are no opposing forces in the universe.

I've mentioned before that I was also aware in that out-of-body state that there's no opposition in this waking world we're living in now, either. They're both part of the same system. So, I've spent a great deal of time and effort trying to figure out what opposition actually is because I know that no two elements of anything can oppose one another. I know this. My answer is as follows. The only opposition that exists in the universe is distraction.

What we presently view as opposition is distraction. The structure of reality is accommodating. It agrees. It cooperates. The structure of reality is all one thing, so it can't oppose itself because it always has the power to give itself whatever it wants. Therefore, the denial of anything is a game. It would be like a hundred different candies sitting in front of a child, and that child saying, "I can only have two of these candies." No one is denying that child any of those candies. In actuality, the child can have any, and all, of the candies. They're sitting right there in front of the kid. The tot is self-denying. He or she is choosing which candies s/he can or can't have, but the reality is that the child can have them all. In that way, the child is playing a game by limiting his or her choices. This is what we do as well. We do this through our focus.

I think the best way to explain this is through the idea of preferences and opinions. I heard a great definition for an opinion the other day, and it's that all opinions have an element of right and wrong or good and bad within them. So, an opinion is an idea that you focus on that has a judgment of right and wrong or good and bad attached to it. There's a quality of separation intertwined in an opinion. You're separating ideas in to acceptable and unacceptable categories when you voice an opinion. Separation is the idea of pulling apart. Thus, there's an element of opposition in it. That is, there's an element of separate positions.

Preferences, on the other hand, are ideas that naturally appeal to you. They're ideas that you want to experience. They're an expression of your inclinations. They're positive by nature and, therefore, unity-oriented. A preference is an experience that you would like to unify with. It's something you want to bring into your experience. Thus, there's an element of allowance within it. That is, there's an element of all positions being available to you.

It should be clear that if you were only voicing your preferences, you'd never have any feeling of opposition in your life whatsoever because preferences are just positive statements. "I want to go here" or "I don't want to go there," are preferences. There's no extra element. They're simple, non-judgmental conclusions about what you'd like to do.

If you're voicing opinions, however, you're generating that feeling that we know as conflict. You may say, "I want to go here," but there's an element of whining involved that includes an addition of an "and" or a "but" or an exception to your statement. So, the statement is really, "I want to go here, and I never get my way" or "I want to go here, but I can't." Or, "I don't want to go here because it's terrible." Always included is the judgment of better and worse, right and wrong, good and bad. This is what creates that feeling of opposition. It's this extra judgment that creates the thing that we know as fighting or being against something. It's our doing. It's not anything anyone else's doing. You don't need an opposing party to feel opposition, though plenty of people are willing to play that role for you.

Opinions are the source of distraction. You're distracted away from your preference and focusing on ideas that are not your preference. Stay in preferences, and you'll never experience opposition. You have to veer over to opinions to be in opposition by being distracted from the things that you like.

This behavior of distracting yourself away from your preferences masks as opposing forces or opposing sides, but it's nothing of the sort. Where you place your focus determines all of this, and it's a solo job. You don't need anyone else to play an opposing part. You make it all up yourself, and then others can play those opposing parts if they mimic your behavior by focusing on ideas that are not their preference in mirror to your behavior. You're a match to one another, in other words.

You see this played out all of the time. You go head to head with people who hold opinions as vehemently as you do. If someone's not really interested in the thing that gives you such angst, you won't be arguing with one another. This is because the other person isn't in opinion. They're in preference. Thus, there's no match.

This is an accommodating universe. The elements cooperate. You cooperate with others who are playing the game the same way you're playing the game.

Another way to explain all of this is to say that it comes down to service. What ideas are serving you? What ideas are not serving you? And what ideas are not serving you and serving someone else? An example is helpful.

Your preference is to be free. Now, you're already free, so what you really want is to feel free. You control the amount of freedom you feel by how much you focus on the idea, "I'm free." The level with which you embody that idea determines how free you feel.

Someone you think is important says to you (or implies), "You can't be free." In that moment, they're offering you a distraction. Your preference was clean. It didn't have any associations of good and bad, or any exceptions, attached to it. But now you're being baited. It's very tempting to offer the opinion, "No, you're wrong. I can be free." There will be a tight feeling associated with this that tells you you're opposing. You're in opinion because underneath this statement is the judgment, "You should want me to be free. It's wrong that you don't want me to be free." At this point, you're in full on distraction.

It looks like the two of you are opposing one another, but this isn't the case. You're each expressing yourselves separately, and the way you express yourselves determines the feeling you're having.

To avoid opposition, you can't let this person you think is important distract you. Their idea is not your preference. If you focus on their idea, you'll begin that process of taking the bait and moving your attention outside of what you want, and it will feel resistant. It will feel oppositional. It will feel like fighting. However, there's no fighting involved here (though it can devolve into what we know to be fighting). There's only you, distracting your attention away from your preference. The universe lets you do this because the universe accommodates everything you do. Because the universe is so accommodating, you're the one that has to exercise control over where you place the focus of your attention if you want to avoid conflict. It can be done.

If you reduce all of this down to a formula of sorts, it looks like this:
-You have a desire.
-Someone says, "No" to your desire.
-You'll get your desire despite what the other person says, unless . . .
-You say, "No" to the person who said "No" to you (this is taking the bait, this is the distraction).

We've been taught that it's righteous to fight things we don't like. So, we stand against lack, negation, limitation, separation, unfairness, unkindness, doubt, hate, and blame, thinking that this is the right thing to do. What it does, is it has us focused, intensely, on the things we don't want, instead of our preferences. So, we lose.

We're taught to form opinions with moral judgments attached to them as a method to solve problems when, in fact, it exacerbates problems. It would be so much more effective and efficient to cut to the chase and focus on what we want. What we want is the solution we're seeking in all cases.

Most of us are broadcasting a steady stream of resistance all time because we're allowing a part of our attention to be focused on the fact that other people can hold opinions that want to deny us our desires. We think we're protecting ourselves from those opinions by maintaining this resistance, but what we're really doing is allowing ourselves to be distracted away from our preferences. It feels like we're protecting ourselves from opposition from other people, but what's really happening is we're opposing other people's ideas by judging those ideas as improper.

The feeling of fight is the feeling of judging someone's idea as immoral. If you do this with enough consistency, you may never get what you want because you'll never be focused on your preferences. You'll always be focused on defense, which is really your accusation that another person's idea is wrong. It doesn't matter whether their idea actually is or it isn't wrong. Your justifying and blaming has you distracted away from your preference. That's what matters.

This is a universe of unity. There are no opposing forces anywhere. There are only accommodating forces. You tell the universe what to accommodate by where you place the focus of your attention. If you're in opposition, you're focused on someone's idea that wants to deny you your preference, and that's where the universe will accommodate you--in the denial of your preferences.

Stick to the pristine clarity of your preference, without distraction, and you're sitting pretty. That's where you'll be focused, and that's where you'll be accommodated. This universe only knows "Yes." You point, with your attention, where you want that "Yes" to take shape. Point it to what you prefer. You deserve to have what you want. Focus on it.

You're reading by Samantha Standish. If you want to learn more about what happened in my out-of-body experience, my book, "Equal," is available for a nominal amount at,

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